Goals

I think I will make it my goal to re-create one of these someday.
In the meantime, go have yourself a good laugh.

A Wizard Did It…

To some extent I am convinced that my daughter is a low level wizard.  “Wizardress” if you will, to avoid the negative connotation associated with the word “witch”.

She only seems to know one spell, it only seems to affect males, and she can only use it at close range, but she seems to have limitless casts and it’s a potent one if you fail your saving throw.

That spell is “sleep”.

Twice now I have been rocking her and have nodded off only to awaken 30+ minutes later.  As soon as she is in my arms with her head resting against my chest I almost immediately start to drowse even if I wasn’t sleepy to begin with.  If you don’t believe me, Heather has pics (*grumble*).  I’ve never experienced anything quite like it before, and I know it’s not just me due to the fact that she seems to have the exact same effect on both my father and my father-in-law.

I don’t know if this is an “every infant” thing or just something unique to my daughter, but if I could somehow bottle and sell this “magic”, I’d be rich in no time.

Baby, I’m Amazed… Part Deux

I whipped up a quick Visio flowchart of how this whole “baby thing” works.  I realize it’s a PDF, and, I apologize for that, but it was the only way I could quickly make it come out nice.

Not bad for a 15 minute flowchart, I think.  Let the lulz commence.

Baby, I’m Amazed…

It’s amazing to me how much a baby can “consume” your life.  A task that would normally just be a matter of course becomes a one-hour ordeal.

Hmmm… I feel the need to create a Visio flowchart on this.  More later (I hope).

I feel like I’m forgetting everything lately…

From putting a trash bag in the trash can to informing my boss that there were some network outages yesterday.

I hope this trend doesn’t continue; I don’t really like the way it’s going.

This day…

…so full of FAIL.

If it wasn’t people, it was stores.  If not stores, it was the gym.

1. We got the time that Amigos opened incorrect so we had to sit and wait on brunch.  Fortunately, Frankie the manager, who we are on good terms with, set us up outside on the patio with some coffee until the restaurant opened for business.  Result: FAIL followed up with WIN.
2. Now an hour off our schedule, we got to the bank and sat in line. In-and-of-itself that wouldn’t have been a big deal, but Heather had to be elsewhere at 1:00pm so we had to forgo other errands.  Result: FAIL.
3. I spent the next few hours trying to find racquetball shoes.  Racquetball shoes exist; that’s not the problem.  The problem is that no one actually carries them *in store*.  Not Dick’s Sporting Goods, not Sports Authority, not Academy, not Foot Locker, not Foot Action, not Champ’s Sports.  The first three all carry the shoes online, but I cannot begin to speak to the ridiculousness of that setup.  I try the shoes on that way how? Result: Epic FAIL.
4. After that I returned home.  Heather came back to an e-mail reply that was irritating mostly due to the way it was written. Sometimes, it’s not that “no” is said, but *how* “no” is said.  Result: Epic FAIL.
5. To top it off, Daniel and I were scheduled to play racquetball at the gym.  No problem: I had made the reservation earlier today.  When I got there, the Daddy-Daughter dance was going on in the basketball courts.  No problem…or so I thought.  As it turns out, that somehow forced the closing of racquetball courts. *boggle* Result: Epic FAIL.

To recap: we’re left with 3 Epic FAILs, 1 FAIL, and one FAIL canceled out by a WIN.

Maybe my dreams during sleep will treat me better than the day actually has. 

Now accepting donations…

…for this piece of beauty here.

For lovely pictures of the child, of course. 

*sigh*

Has it really been over a month since I last blogged?

Time flies when your wife is pregnant, I guess.  Change is coming and happening.  Too much change, sometimes, it seems.

Ah, well.  Life goes on. 

Radio Shack, RIP

Radio Shack used to be a neat place to go into.  I remember going there with my dad when I was a child and being mesmerized by all of the cool toys and gadgets.  It’s gotten to the point now, though, that as soon as I step through the door I feel like I’m being molested by the sales associates.

I made the mistake of stopping by a Radio Shack on my way home last night because I couldn’t remember if I had a digital audio cable (or a composite video cable – its humble yet efficient substitute) in my inventory of cables and wanted to check their pricing.

With bated breath, I stepped into the store.  No associates rushed forth to “claim” me.
Stealthily I made my way over to the A/V cables.  Still good.
As soon as I found what I was looking for, it was as if I had played the “May I Help You riff” from Wayne’s World:

RS Employee: “Can I help you?”
Me: “I’m just looking at prices on cables.”
RS Employee: <turning into a rabid squirrel> “OMGwhatkindofcabledoyouneed?!”
Me: <sighing> “I just need pricing on a digital audio cable.”
RS Employee: <scanning the shelves and pointing vaguely> “OMGthey’rerighthere!”
Me: <backing away slowly> “‘K.  Thanks…”
RS Employee: <sticking near me like a leech>
Me: “OK. Got what I needed…Thanks…” <runs for the door>

Seriously, when you have the audacity to charge $16+ for a 3-foot cable (and you sell a similar one “web only” for $3) you FAIL.  I ran into the same problem the other day searching for a component cable, but was fortunate enough to not go to their store that day.

I guess, ultimately, I stopped by for reasons of nostalgia last night.  Radio Shack used to be a great place to go when you were looking for obscure components or needed an adapter that you knew you wouldn’t be able to get anywhere else.  As it stands, I can now find most of what I need quickly, closely, and inexpensively at Target(! – yes, Target), and Fry’s Electronics and Altex still carry all the obscure components I could wish for where I can shop without being molested by sales associates.  Even then, that’s only when I don’t have the time or patience to wait for an online order to be delivered.

Sorry, Radio Shack.  You will not be forgotten, but you’ve done this to yourself and you will not be missed.

“Do you know what time it is?”

If someone calls my home phone before 8:00am, then I can think of only a few reasons for a legitimate call:

• Because someone I know is dead
• Because someone I know is in the hospital
• Because you’ve been falsely imprisoned and you need me to get a hold of the A-Team to break you out

Just about anything else can wait until after the start of the business day.  Calling at 7:11am and not being remotely sorry for waking me up after calling all day yesterday because you want to get a copy of my neighborhood home owner’s association newsletter so that you can advertise in it IS NOT A VALID REASON TO CALL.  (Yes, that run-on sentence was necessary.)  Turns out that our HOA is run by volunteers and my wife has a business to run.  You’ll get called back when she has time to call you back.

And not that this guy will ever read this blog, but I don’t care how you spell your last name when it’s before 8:00am, man.